Soft and true

Aruba, March 2024

When I got home today, I was relieved to see you there,
I fell into your arms and gave in to that cry
You didn’t seem startled, you just traced the line in my hair,
and said it’s worse in my head, that life wasn't that bad

It made me feel guilty for wanting to be alone,
just two days ago, needing space of my own.
And when you said you loved me, soft, out of the blue,
it somehow sank heavy, felt worse, untrue.

You’re rough to everyone, sharp in your tone,
but to me you are soft in a way that’s your own.
I guess it’s just luck, something I never pursued,
I hope I’m as often in your thoughts as you are in mine, in that same quiet mood.

You said I was magnetic to the touch,
you stole that line from my train of though.
I almost said it first, it sat on my tongue,
but you took it from me before I was done.

I jumped in the pool with my shoes still on,
and you yelled, “who the fuck let you loose?”
The moon was light blue, hanging low in the view,
I screamed, “if you love me, give me a clue.”

And you jumped in after, like you always do,
held me there, close, like you knew what I’d do,
You mumbled something soft, something about us two,
then said I was childish, in all the ways you thought were fun.

Somehow that felt true.